Are you guys using routers? perhaps the problem is you have not correctly set up a port range to use for active mode connections (PORT). F6 'Connections' tab, option "Limite local port range to". This port range must be defined in flashfxp and correctly forwarded in your router settings.
Apologise if that was no help and/or wrong, it is just a theoretical suggestion since i do not own an xbox myself. But it can't hurt to check. Also posting a status log of whatever the error may be could be useful. (the new issue that is, now that you figured out that the xbox does not support extended LIST parimatres)
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